Dear Sl*ts of Lebanon…


Disclaimer: This is a rant – my angriest one yet – although ironically, I’m not angry at all… But, I guess there’s no better way to write this than by presenting a “below the belt” public service announcement to a horrible genre of women who need to be disciplined. I will not be reciting phrases from the Bible, nor will I be promoting world peace. If you find foul language offensive, this is not the blog for you, and you may move along to greener pastures. And as always, to those of you who are insecure little haters, please feel free to write sweet insults to me in the comments section. 

In the past three years, I’ve blogged about anything and everything imaginable, except the “home-wrecking ho”. After countless get-togethers with my girls, their girls and their girls, I’ve come to notice how the concept of friendship among women is slowly diminishing as we get older, and is being replaced with competitiveness – especially where men are related. To explain my point further and with more accuracy, we were all able to agree on one common point: we are just about sick and f***ing tired of stupid b****es who are obsessed with finding a man at any cost that they will blatantly and shamefully take a shot at any attempt to break up a happy couple.

They will lurk around any given relationship and wait like vultures to pounce on the next available man. God forbid these desperate sl*ts actually try finding an already single guy to call their own – but no – it doesn’t work that way. These lazy b****es have no time to waste, and are only drawn to what’s tried and tested. They firmly believe that if Ms. X was happy with Mr. X, then he must really have something special going on – and of course, the desperate vulture will no longer be able to resist f***ing off until she gets her share. It’s even sadder when her attempts are unreciprocated, yet she will continue stalking and groveling after the same guy for months because yes, she is that desperate and undesired. We all know these silly hoes don’t pose a threat to anyone, but neither do flies – and guess what? Flies are swatted because they’re f***ing annoying!

BUT, if a man does fall for those antics and gets tempted to cheat, leave or “get some space,” you may thank whatever higher power you believe in for revealing that he’s not one of the few good ones, and not waste a second more of your time on such a lost cause.

On that note, the very reason why men are almost always eager to return to singlehood, is because they know they’ll have 1001 desperate sl*ts, with no notion of any moral code, ready to pounce on them and their joysticks. Since these men don’t possess an ounce of quality in their bones, quality certainly won’t be what they’re looking for, let alone appreciate.

We all know that there are girls you fall for and girls you just f***, but the latter is really making life difficult for the rest of us. Nice girls are absolutely sick and tired of trying to explain to a man that:

  • 3 AM phone calls from crying, whiny, clingy b****es is wrong, nay, abnormal;
  • An ex “friend with benefits” who you’ve “benefited” in the past few months is not a friend;
  • A girl sending swimsuit photos and winks is in fact a horny sl** that wants you to slap her around in bed;

And that,

  • A stranger you met 3 days ago at a bar is not planning on being “just friends.”

This is just borderline retarded…
Men who need these things explained to them are just retarded!

So, to the retarded men out there, we all know you’re not actually stupid, so stop pretending to be f***tards and give us a break every once in a while. We are very aware of how precious your ego is to you – but get over yourselves already. This is getting really old, really fast.

And to the sl*ts of Lebanon and the world, I would like to say this:

First of all, we all know a sl** when we see one. It doesn’t take a rocket scientist to figure that one out. We also know about all your sad attempts and strategies and laugh about them.

Second of all, you all need to enforce a strict female version of the “Bros before Hoes” rule – we can call it “Sisters before Misters.” It doesn’t matter if you know the girl or not. It doesn’t matter if you’re a desperate piece of sh*t who hasn’t gotten laid in months. It also doesn’t matter if you’re old, ugly and on the verge of releasing your last fertile egg. It’s very simple – being a man-thief is a BIG no-no. Why? Because you wouldn’t want another ho trying to steal your man – it is pure common sense. When a man is fresh out of a relationship, at least one of two people is broken – what kind of disgusting person would want to plunge herself into that equation?

So, why am I so angry? Why now? Because 1) I finally have 3 free hours to make this world a better place; and because 2)  in my 13 years of dating experience, I have never given the time of day to one guy who is 1) taken, or 2) fresh out of a breakup. In fact, I have always encouraged them to give it another chance or at least give themselves some time alone. Any good woman with a conscience would do the same. Any woman who has ever experienced heartache or betrayal would never forget how that felt, and would never try to be the cause of that to another woman. All I know is, there is a special place in hell for women that don’t help out other women, and that thought makes me all f***ing warm inside.


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17 responses to “Dear Sl*ts of Lebanon…

  1. paola

    Thank you thank you!!! This must be a PSA for all them thirsty desperate hoes

  2. Elissa

    Well finally a read we can relate to!
    Ive been reading all ur blogs just now wahaha too funny!!

  3. Max

    There is a whole song dedicated to them Called Youz a Hoe !

    love the read keep my entertainment coming !

  4. Andy

    Not sure if a female version of “bros before hoes” is what’s needed. That’s thrown around as excuse to treat a woman like shit.

    Although I do where you’re coming from here.

  5. Fady

    What you talking about takes strength to being at risk, and women simply can’t be at risk , it’s gods will i am afraid !

  6. You must have a statue of yourself standing tall in the centre of the country where everyone can see it.

  7. wow. round of applause.
    u go girl!

  8. rhea

    Everytime I come across one of your articles ,I hope you’d get more mature in your language and jargon ,but the more I find out you’re exactly like these girls you describe

    • Rita D.

      Why thank you, so kind of you to still be reading my posts despite how much they disappointed you. I also thank you for remaining so patiently positive about me eventually changing into a decent woman who’s not a shallow gold-digging, husband-hunting tart. You’re the sweetest ever!

  9. rhea

    And you know there are asshole guys too as much as there as the s**** you describe

  10. Man Ray

    Unfortunately, I think you’ve missed a vital point here and in many of your other blog posts. It’s very easy to tell people how to act, but much harder to ask why they act as such in the first place. By describing girls as ‘easy’ or ‘sluts’ or ‘hoes’ you’re guilty of perpetuating the issue rather than solving it.

    As someone who claims to be above this shallowness, you clearly spend a lot of time thinking/writing about it. Every post you write about is about relationships or some other topic which you attest to find superficial.

    You live in a country which is traditionally patriarchal and has some deep-seated misogynistic tendencies. By criticising other girls themselves, rather that looking at the prevalent issues on a more fundamental level, you are doing nothing but keeping the status quo.

    It’s all very well to have certain values to which you think others should adhere and to some extent it’s your right to espouse those opinions. But the language and aggressive nature of your attacks on girls for expressing themselves as individuals isn’t a particularly helpful. Indeed, I’d go as far as to say it’s almost pernicious.

    The fact that people read/agree with/might have their opinions changed by what you write is only going to exacerbate the situation. If you really care about ‘sisters over misters’ (as trite as the hip-hop speak you so hate) then stand up for and support your fellow females in a country which doesn’t always do so.

    If I have to hear one more Lebanese girl describe someone else as ‘easy’ or a ‘slut’ I’m going to punch them in the stomach. Do you honestly think it’s constructive? If a girl wants to engage in sexual activity outside of a relationship, that doesn’t make her a slut. If a girl wants to sleep with more than one person at the same time, that doesn’t make her a slut. If a girl (and this is Lebanon so chances are she might well be a virgin) likes to flirt with guys on a night out this does NOT make her a slut.

    It’s a disgusting word so full of connotations and aggression. When a man calls a girl a slut it’s bad enough. When a woman starts to do the same, then it becomes even worse because it makes it more permissible/normalises men’s use of the word. You can’t have your cake and eat it.

    Don’t criticise girls for having too much plastic surgery. Ask them why they feel that need. Don’t criticise girls for feeling social pressures for getting married. Ask why they feel this way. Don’t criticise girls for feeling that they need a guy to give they life meaning. Ask them what is missing from their life that makes them feel this need…etc. etc.

    Please, please, please don’t exacerbate the issues which you think you’re trying to fix. If you actually want to make a difference with what you write, then look beneath the surface and stand up for people who clearly aren’t as ‘wise’ as you…

    • Sonia

      I completely agree with you Man Ray.

      @Rita D. I read you 28 Years, 28 Lessons post and was inspired, but then I read this and though wtf. When you call another woman a slut, you are not supporting or helping women. It doesn’t matter who they are or what they’ve done. In my experience, women who act promiscuously and pathetically try to steal boyfriends are very troubled people and you should try to have sympathy for them and help them.

  11. sighh123

    Just because you cant get a guy doesnt mean you have to call other hoes and sluts. Lebanese women are beautiful and all I see is jealousy in your post. Tsk tsk.

    • Rita D.

      1. My post was not directed at all lebanese women. Read again incase you have a short attention span. 2. I love how every time an immature, uncreative person wants to find an explanation to something, they use the “jealousy” or “can’t get a guy” card. I’m sorry if you feel concerned with what I wrote – the best thing for you to do is to stop being a sl*t and you won’t get offended when someone attacks them 🙂 cheers!

      • Man Ray

        Interesting how you fail to reply to the previous comment. You are everything that’s wrong with this country…

  12. do you know how to find a nerve and stomp all over it.
    of all the posts i’ve read in this blog (which, by the way,kudos on not ever being boring. and on your command of the language! Your writings are an absolute delight to your readers.) this is my favorite.
    Not because i necessarily with it, but rather because it’s the one i find the most flawed and the most one-sided. Yes. women shouldn’t be with taken men. Yes, Women should value themselves more than that. Yes. every point you’ve made is absolutely flawless. but i have a few objections. You argue the women, you discuss the women, you even swear at the women, do you not consider women who have fallen for taken men victims? they can’t all be bitches, do remember that the opposite sex is one that is fundamentally flawed and while it may seem like a simple bitch thing to do, sometimes even the biggest mastermind of women fall for taken men. i see in your next blogpost you idolize marilyn monroe, commemorating one of her quotes. she wasn’t well mannered, she wasnt a simple bitch. and she took on a taken man, if not more. where does she fall into your rant? simple bitch? raging whore? or a girl who fell inlove with the wrong guy? someone who just should’ve known better? what about the men who manage to have their cake and eat it too? unfortunately in matters of the heart, it’s not all black and white and believe you me, i am not making a case for liars, cheaters and the likes, all i’m saying is maybe there could be a bit more to it than a girl calling up a guy at 3 am being a needy cunt.
    Another point I’d like to throw out there as food for thought, and this is from personal experience. I got stuck in a certain situation, wherein the man i was seeing had failed to inform me that he in fact was already in a committed relationship with a young lady, about my age, who had moved in with him. The minute i found out, and i promise you this was not in a moment of rage, but rather in an act of solitude, i dumped him on the spot and made sure i informed her of what she was getting herself into. (mind you i did allow him some time to come clean to her, when he said he wouldn’t, i stepped forward). she was adult enough to be thankful for my honesty and moved herself out of his apartment after thanking me. so far so good right? i mean. you would think girls sticking together and helping each other out is wonderful and all smiles glitter and unicorn.
    well here’s what proceeded to happen (and mind you i had gotten so much shit from my friends for having told her because as we say in arabic let each one rip their own thorns with their bare hands which vaguely means i should’ve extracted myself out of that situation and let her be with her cheating lying spineless excuse of a man. This lovely lady whom, to this point i had the utmost respect for, went on to (oh get this.) CREATE. A. YOUTUBE. VIDEO. FOR. THE. WORLD. TO. SEE. WITH. PICTURES. OF. HER. AND. HIM. AND. SCREENSHOTS. OF. THEIR. TEXTS. playing to the song of “i won’t give up on us” or some other sob fest by bruno mars aching to crawl back to a previous love.

    what a wonderful waste.
    i do hope they’re happy together now. or apart. but by god things are never black and white in matters of the heart, after being given what would seem to be a get out of jail free card, this girl went crawling back despite the warning, and A lot would. I realize now, it really wasn’t my place to say anything, i should’ve walked out of that situation, and let it all be as it is. if a situation is not something i want for myself, it might be something another is willing to give up everything for. you know what they say about one man’s trash…
    in conclusion my dear, what you’ve written seems angry and is full of things that are arguable which is why this post is my favorite, and i hope i’ve given you a few things to think of, and maybe try n blame the assholes that women have to deal with for what they’ve become.
    george carlin says, women are crazy, and men are stupid. and the primary reason that woman are crazy, is that men are stupid….
    Also… on a whole other note. i don’t appreciate the title of this article. I’m lebanese myself and i’m certain that this is not a nationality thing… but rather some sort of gender-wide issue that all communities face.

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